Hello – and welcome to my blog!
I’m a UK-based, British woman and I first became aware of my autistic identity in 2014.
I was in the habit of using online, key word searches whilst attempting to understand baffling behaviour (myself and others). These searches, which have been a lifelong habit (using books and magazines previously), led me to start reading about autism and Aspergers.
I decided to start this blog after accepting treatment early in 2018 for what has been the most emotionally crippling experience and diagnosis of severe anxiety and depression. I identified with the constellation of behaviours which is currently called ‘autism’ in adult women, I hadn’t thought it necessary to seek a professional assessment and help until I reached a point of complete breakdown..
My hope is that my story and this blog helps and supports you and particularly other women.
I offer positive words and images and would like to contribute an inspirational approach to what I believe is the emergence of respectful acknowledgment for human neurodiversity – and something I feel excited about being a part of.
A bit more about me
My life’s treasure is a wonderful, vibrant, adult son (from my only short marriage) who lives nearby. At home, I live with a bossy, small dog who goes just about everywhere with me (on foot or in the rucksack when she’s tired).
My career until quite recently has been in communication, marketing and advertising. Photography is important to me, I have quite a few arts and crafts interests and love to immerse myself in the outdoors. I’ve always sought to be close to the beauty and rawness of the natural world and enjoy exploring wild places, being close to free-living animals on land and in the sea and sky. Whenever I can, I read, listen to classical music and tend to keep and write diaries…
I believe I’m very fortunate that my life has been rooted in a daily Buddhist practise of Nichiren Buddhism. I was introduced to this practise when I was 20 years old and I continue with Soka Gakkai International (SGI) today.
After spending time reading other people’s careful work, books, blogs, websites and researching autism for the last few years, it now feels as if parts of me – which have been buried in the depths of my life – have finally started to become visible to me.
“Never think that you are a small, unimportant being. There may be times when you lose confidence in yourself because you feel hurt or angered by someone. But know that your life is infinitely precious, and you have potential as vast as the universe. … Chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo, (they) have brought forth the supremely powerful life state of Buddahood and faced and triumphed over all kinds of obstacles and difficulties. “
From the perspective of the limitless expanse of the universe, the Earth is just a tiny planet. Chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo, opening your mind broadly, and revealing your boundless life force allows you to look calmly even at problems that seem insurmountable.”
Quote From SGI, April 1st, 2017 edition of the Future Journal, translation released May, 2018.
I’ll always do my best to attribute/directly link any sources/materials for my writings to my blog and thank you in advance for your support.
My work & buddhist practice
Through this blog I will talk about my work, interests and buddhist experiences in general and about how – and what – has helped me to keep going, break through my difficulties and to grow towards happiness.
I will not under any circumstances blog or be drawn into public conversations about specifics of my work, my buddhist organisation or the people I interact with. This is due to the potential for misunderstandings and misrepresentation, and the hurt and damage that these could easily cause.
I have not used my name on this blog. However I am under no illusions about anonymity on the internet. If you are reading this blog and if you think you know me, you probably do. Congratulations! I have also trusted some individuals with blog access information. Please respect my decision not to use my name and don’t identify me publically. However if you’re interested in the content and ever want to chat about it over coffee, you know where to find me.